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Hey Everyone!! Stop explaining yourself for every “NO” you say.

Yes! right now. I’m quite sure we all experience this almost every day where we give an awkward explanation for an answer(especially, if it’s a “NO”). If you are one of those few people who don’t do this. Congratulations, You are just awesome and people should learn from you! But if you do over-explain yourself, please feel free to explain yourself in the comment section. ‘pun intended’

So what is “over-explaining”?

“over-explaining” is that even a word? Not sure about the word but it’s a habit, which impacts the lives of many. So let’s try to understand what over-explaining ourselves actually means. When I say “Stop explaining yourself” it doesn’t mean you should avoid/stop meaningful discussions with other people or stop explaining your point to others. What it means is that you should Stop vomiting a load of unprovoked justification. 

 

explaining

 

People over-explain mostly for saying “NO”:

Typical Example:


Boss: So Ankit, I was thinking that it would be great if you can come to the office on the weekend and assist production movement for this new product. What do you think?

Me(In my head): Fuck No Dude! I have a life outside this office. Never gonna happen. ‘victory_laugh’

Me(In reality): I’m not very sure Boss! I’m planning to visit my parent and then we are gonna for my cousin’s marriages together it would difficult canceling everything and the canceling charges on the tickets are too much. I will think about it and let you know.


Now Guys, you have to agree this happens all the time. Not just in professional life but also in personal life as well(How many times you have to explain your career choice to your relatives and friends or justify your salary or explain your choice of partner?).

Some at least think about it and feeling the need to stop explaining themselves but some think it’s their responsibility to explain everything to everyone.

So why do we do it?

Trying not to get Judged: People have a tendency to avoid getting judged and thus they try to explain and provide unwanted justification and irrelevant information.

We have a problem with saying “No”: People have a problem of unable to say No directly to almost anything. For example: Even if we are not interested in a plan(mostly Goa) we have an inner urge not to say no immediately. We look for reasons and justification that other people can understand.

But the fun fact is that “over-explaining” usually doesn’t help. But it can lead to further questions and explanations. ☹️ 

So as we understood from this terribly lengthy explanation, that too much of explanation is good for nothing. But how do we Stop it? Well that a very good question and tbh I have no clue. Recently I have started working on avoiding “over-explain” myself and below are few tips I follow.

  • Be confident about yourself! – Understand that you can only control your action and not other people’s perception. So stop giving a fuck about what people might think about you.
  • Avoid “over-explaining” yourself once and then do it twice and then do it again and again.

 

say NO

 

Even KATY PERRY(I hope this was her official tweet) agrees with us. Hope it helps you guys in one way or another. Feel free to add more tips and trick using the comment section.

Ankit.

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